well, as you might or might not have known, my mom died last year. ya, I know, first reaction is 'I'm so sorry!' and on with the sympathy. the main reason i don't usually tell people is because i despise sympathy...I really do....it's not my cup of tea. well, automatically most people(not all) say 'oh yah, i know how you feel cause my grandma died!' but the truth is, these people will not know unless it actually happens to them. cause losing a mom or a dad is the worst of all. because you spend every moment with them and you live with them and you cry with them and you laugh with them and you are always around them and you see their face every morning and every night....i could go on...but basically you just have a bond with a mom or a dad that you just can not have with any other kind of relative relationship. period. that is why i hate it when people tell me they know how i feel cause their grandma died. cause the truth is unless you were raised by that person, you will never know what it feels like to hear that your mom died....the impact of those few words hits hard and stays....it hits you and you kinda sit there for a few moments. shocked. you can not say a word. not one word. and then when you realize that it is the truth and that she is never coming back and that she is never gonna hug you and again and say that she loves you. you will never feel the warmth of your own mother's touch again. because she is gone and she is not coming back. ever. you will never be able to hear her laugh or speak to her again...ever. deal with that. deal with that day by day. drag yourself out of bed everyday to face the world and know that your mother is not there. and she won't be. see her face on the wall. see yourself with her in pictures. feel your eyes begin to sting and look back into her eyes...indescribable words...I think I will stop now.